


sew up the seams

by CronbachAlpha



Series: The Gaslight Series [1]
Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-27
Updated: 2013-03-27
Packaged: 2017-12-06 15:47:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/737407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CronbachAlpha/pseuds/CronbachAlpha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thor knew it would take time for Clint to trust him, but he was a patient man.</p>
            </blockquote>





	sew up the seams

            No one knew Clint could sing. Natasha probably knew, but Thor wasn’t sure. Her only expression was a poker face that only Clint could read.

            Not that Thor cared. It didn’t matter if anyone else knew.

            Clint would never sing for them.

            He watched Clint in silence, the archer’s blue gray eyes closed as he strummed on the guitar. His voice was rich and coarse as he sang, his emotions pouring out with each verse. For a few minutes, Clint’s walls were down and he exposed himself to the god.

            Only to Thor.

            Only **for** Thor.

  
 _Pull it out, turn it up, what's your favorite song?_  
 _That's mine, I've been crying to it since I was young_  
 _I know there's someone out there feeling just how I feel_  
 _I know they're waiting up, I know they're waiting to heal_  
 _And I've been holding my breath,_  
 _Are you holding your breath, for too many years to count?_

            Thor watched Clint, the man sitting at the end of the bed, legs crossed, eyes closed as he let himself get lost in the music.

            It had taken Clint a while to lower his guard around Thor. He didn’t blame Clint, really. When Loki got his hold on him, he affected Clint, greatly. Clint didn’t like to talk about it, but described it like Loki had pulled him out of his body and replaced him with a monster. The archer was horrified at the damage he caused, and it was only his mind being preoccupied with the final battle that kept the man from going insane with guilt.

            Natasha had helped, to a degree, but Thor knew that she would never bare herself on an emotional level. Clint wouldn’t either. That was who they were and Thor knew he couldn’t change that.

            The god watched Clint from his spot on the bed, letting the man sing.

  
 _And we waited for sirens that never come_  
 _And we only write by the moon, every word handwritten_  
 _And to ease the loss of youth and how many years I've missed you_  
 _Pages plead forgiveness, every word handwritten_

           Thor felt like he needed to fix what Loki caused – that he needed to help Clint somehow recover or come to terms of his brainwashing.

           Clint resisted at first. He didn’t exactly treat the god with hostility, but Thor knew his dealings with Loki made the archer suspicious of him and Thor didn’t blame him. He knew Clint was going to be wary around him for quite some time.

           It was a good thing Thor was a patient man.

           The team was surprisingly forgiving and understanding and Thor wondered if their kindness changed Clint. If they could find it in their hearts to accept and embrace Clint as one of their own, then Clint could with Thor.  
  
 _Let it out, let me in, take a hold of my hand_  
 _There's nothing like another soul that's been cut up the same_  
 _And did you wanna drive without a word in-between?_  
 _I can understand, you need a minute to breathe_  
 _And to sew up the seams... after all this defeat_

           Clint tolerated Thor at first. He’d let the god near him, but only within a few feet. Only when Thor entered arms length of the archer did Clint go on the defensive. He would eye Thor through slits, gunmetal blue eyes cold, until Thor took a step or two back from him. Only then would Clint relax.

           He would note how Clint would absentmindedly touch his chest when he came too close and it took Thor a great deal of strength to not frown at how Clint’s face look pained when he would recall his actions and time with Loki.

           Loki was his brother, and he’d never stop being his brother, even after all the trouble he caused. It didn’t mean Thor had to accept what he did to Clint.

           He wasn’t sure when or why his protectiveness of the archer emerged. There was something vulnerable about Clint that made Thor want to pull him into his arms and protect him from the world.

           He once wanted to ask Natasha if Clint hid a vulnerable side, but he knew the answer the minute she glanced at him.

  
 _And we waited for sirens that never come_  
 _And we only write by the moon, every word handwritten_  
 _And to ease the loss of youth and the many, many years I missed you_  
 _Pages plead forgiveness, every word handwritten_

           It took many battles with Thor watching Clint’s back, protecting him from an unseen enemy or catching him as he fell, before the archer finally let Thor in. The thunder god didn’t realize Clint let him in at first until the man slapped him in the back once in wordless thanks.

           When he was finally allowed inside Clint’s walls Thor see a different side of the archer. The man was usually deadpan, but he had a sense of humor and a snark that rivaled Tony’s; he rarely smiled, but when he did it lit up the room and it reached his eyes; he often acted aloof, but when his team (which Thor suspected was the closest he had to a family) was in danger he became a fierce force.

           It was this side of Clint that made Thor fall, hard. Jane Foster was beautiful and intelligent, true, but Clint had something she didn’t. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but there was something about the archer Thor desired. These days, he still wasn’t sure what it was that drew him to the archer, and he didn’t care.

           He asked Natasha for permission to court Clint – partly due to his own upbringing, partly in order to seek her approval after Loki’s actions. It pleased him, greatly, when she accepted his declaration (with some terms added, of course). Clint himself was shocked when Thor announced his intentions, but the god swore that the archer was pleased.

  
 _Here, in the dark, I cherish the moonlight_  
 _I'm in love with the way you're in love with the night_  
 _And it travels from heart, to limb, to pen_

           Their courtship was slow and awkward at first – Clint was never quite sure what to do and was uncomfortable with Thor’s open affections. Over time, Clint lowered his guard and was more receptive of the god’s advances, letting Thor place a hand on his shoulder or stand so close to him they touched. He still shied from public displays of affection and Thor accepted that Clint was private man a long time ago.

           When they were alone, Thor found Clint would lower his walls fully, leaving his entire being open to the god. Thor knew all his fears, desires, needs, insecurities, joys, passions, and, most important of all, his trust.

           Thor knew that scared the man the most – to completely put his faith into one person.

           He trusted Natasha with his life.

           He trusted Thor with his heart.

  
 _And we waited for sirens that never come_  
 _And we only write by the moon, every word handwritten_  
 _And with this pen, I thee wed_  
 _From my heart to your distress_

           Clint wasn’t always able to discuss his feelings with words and sometimes there were no words for what he wanted to say. Thor accepted that. Actions spoke louder for Clint than words. That was why Clint let Thor listen to him sing. Singing was Clint at his most vulnerable, every chorus and verse baring his soul.

           The rest of the team didn’t know he could sing. Only Thor did.

           Most importantly, only Thor was allowed to listen.

_And with this pen, I thee wed  
From my heart to your distress_

_And with this pen, I thee wed  
From my heart to your distress_

            Thor moved slightly until he was behind the archer, arranging himself so Clint was between his legs. He wrapped one around Clint’s waist, making sure he didn’t move the guitar and interrupt Clint’s playing. The archer tilted his head up slightly as he sang, his strumming slowing as he approached the last verse. He lowered his head and smiled against Clint’s neck, his free hand reaching up to gently touch his upper arm. Clint had sung this for him many a time before – he knew every line and strum by heart.

            He smiled, closing his eyes, listening to Clint sing, softly mouthing the last line against Clint’s neck, his voice a hushed whisper:

_Every word handwritten_

            He knew Clint was smiling.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally, this was going to be one of my "Thunderstruck" vignettes, but this had more story behind it so I felt it deserved its own post. Consider this a companion piece to Thunderstruck's "I met a girl who sang the blues". 
> 
> Lyrics to "Handwritten" belong to The Gaslight Anthem. They're an amazing group. I listened to the acoustic version of "Handwritten" while writing this, which you can find here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ofet34bWwnI
> 
> UPDATE 4/30/2013: This is now the first part to my series of songfics to the music of The Gaslight Anthem.


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